With the arrival of March next week; let’s consider some of the resolutions we made for 2018, after all January seems like a distant memory.
Common themes often to be associated with New Year’s resolutions are: dry January, healthy eating kicks, starting the gym, giving up smoking…
Some we dutifully try to keep and if you have managed to do this then well done! Keep up the good work, you are nearly 2 months down!
However, juggling the work/life balance often means resolutions that are made can be easily broken. For resolutions that have fallen by the wayside, we need to consider whether they have been realistic and therefore achievable. Falling at the first hurdle can often lead to feeling frustrated, the idea of trying to then move forward into a new year can seem such a challenge contemplating, ‘can I actually do this? Well do you know what, yes you can!
Personal goals for the new year
Forget the resolutions you struggled to keep and now think of some goals you would like to work on over the coming months…
It can sometimes be hard thinking about personal goals. Let’s start to think….
- What is important to you?
- What are the things I would like to achieve in 2018?
- What do you want to do and not the things society tells you, you should be doing?
Now imagine the things you want to do, places you would like to go and the people you want to see.
Spending more time together as a family is one of my personal goals for 2018 and this year, in our home weekends are an ideal time for this to happen. I know there are no work commitments or distractions that can get in the way of family time, going to the park, bowling or simply playing a board game or completing a jigsaw together!
Ultimately, we try and incorporate family time into each weekend, however the trap of deadlines and work commitments can easily get in the way. When you have conditioned your brain to link weekend’s with catching up on work and sleep for so long, it can be very hard to change these unhelpful behaviours, adjusting to a new way of thinking. Someone once shared with me the following analogy…
‘Change is like putting your feet into a new pair of shoes. Yes, they might hurt at first and you often find yourself wanting to revert back to wearing those good old faithful’s but if you persevere then you will grow to become your good old faithful’s!’
I now share this way of thinking with my clients. I find it is an analogy we can all relate to at times. The ‘comfy converse’, the good old faithful trainers that have holes in and are falling apart but still, we refuse to change them for a new pair. The new pair might give us a blister or two at first, feel uncomfortable but the reality is this, they will be the ones that withstand the rain. The more we wear them in, the more comfortable they will become and soon replace our reliable converse!
Change is uncomfortable, no one likes change! I for one am a prime candidate when it comes to being resistant to personal changes. Whilst I get excited about the idea of doing something new, my head often reeling with new ideas, often when it comes down to making change happen, ‘grabbing the bull by the horns’, it can stir up feelings of unease in the pit of my stomach. This leads to the dilemma, ‘have I done the right thing?’
So here is the part where I tell myself what I tell others, ‘change is hard, but the more times we do it the easier it gets until the change becomes the norm!’
Remember…
- Think about what you want to do this year, not the things that society often dictates.
- Set as many goals as you like, only take them one step at a time.
- Do not set something that is unrealistic or unachievable.
- Above all in 2018 be kind to yourself.